New Mexico
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Come to New Mexico, see the majestic views, and the historic culture. But you might want to keep your return trip date open, to allow for possible court dates, and time served.
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Bigger Hammer
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You can try, try again, or you can sit down and cry. But sometimes, all you really need is to be a little more.... persuasive.
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That's How I roll
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Let them know why you did it, even before they ask. Cause that's the way you roll, baby!
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Salsa
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Who can resist a good salsa once in awhile? And with fresh ingredients like these, you might just be tempted to gnaw on the merchandise.
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Beautiful Day
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Sometimes, by the time the 5 o'clock whistle blows, there's nothing left to say but "Another beautiful day, shot to hell"
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The Earth Is Changing
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We weren't the first, we won't be the last. Did you really think the world was going to stop forming just for us?
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Savvy De Burro
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Sometimes a person puts such a display of intelligence, that there is only one way to discribe it
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Jerk
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Maybe it's not your fault some people don't like you. Some folks just can't take a joke.
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Shut Your Pie Hole
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Ever wish someone would just stop talking? Just give them 'the look', and point to your shirt.
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Paradox
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Wake up, strech a bit, then realize it's about to be just another day at the office.
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I Am Here
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Let them know exactly where you stand.
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Screw U
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Kind of self explanitory. If you don't get it, you probably don't want to know.
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Weather
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Don't like the weather? Wait five minutes. But don't bother guessing.
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Tall Fences
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All these fights about border security..... Why can't we all just get along, and stay on our own sides?
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My Own Wife
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It's all on the shirt. Wear it proudly, and get ready to run.
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My Own Hubby
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Why should the men have all the fun? Ladies, even things up with this design.
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If I'm Wrong
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Let's not waste time over long explanations, arguments, or apologies.
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Red And Green Chile
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May red and green adorn your kitchen year round, and may you forever feel the warmth of the Southwest.
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Beer Belly
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While you make payments on your fancy car, and your gym membership, I'll show you what I have worked on for years, and have all paid off.
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Veni
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You may not be able to conquer, but at least you have the choice of never returning.
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Expert
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Don't confuse Professional with Expert.
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Turn The Other Cheek
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If no one stood up for themselves, there wouldn't be many countries left in this world. And those that would be left, wouldn't be the kind I would like to live in....
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Ride A Bike
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What with the price of fossil fuels, not a bad idea. Besides, how would you feel if a million years from now, someone was going to dig you up and set you on fire?
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Keep An Open Mind
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If nobody was ever open to new ideas, we would all still be living in caves.
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Old As Dirt
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Old and proud! Of course, ever since they invented dirt, things have gotten a lot - uh - dirtier.
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Jebus
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Before you do anything rash, ask yourself."What would Jebus Do?" Of course, it might help if you meet someone named Jebus, first.
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Wahmbulance
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If you keep whining like that, I'm going to have to call in the professionals.
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Queen Of Denial
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It's not just a river in Egypt, and it doesn't take long to find it's queen.
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Smiles
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Make 'em smile. And if the t shirt doesn't work, try a dirty joke.
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Thiss Too Shall Pass
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When King Solomon requested a magic ring that "If a happy man looks at it, he becomes sad, and if a sad man looks at it, he becomes happy", his most trusted minister brought him a ring with these 3 hebrew letters engraved on it.
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High On Life
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You don't need drugs. Just learn how to live a little.
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Cinco De Mayo
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I see French fast food on every corner (Crepe Bell), ..... Dunno, i think I kinda prefer my salsa and chips.
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Fixed
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OK, call it a vasectomy. Whatever. All I remember is it was my wife's idea, and things just havn't been quite the same since.
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Hey Babe
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The wind in our hair, bugs up our nose....... Let's go!
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Guy With The Gun
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Somehow everything changes perspective when there is a firearm involved...
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Repo
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This is why I try to only buy shirts that I can pay for in full.
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Menopause
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Yeah, yeah, women have it so hard. Try being a man in that woman's life......
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Screaming Of Children
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Mommy! Johnny's LOOKING at me! You can only tone it out for so long, before you join in.
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Them Apples
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...Just in case you don't have anything witty to say to follow up your most triumphant moment.
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Real Women Use Tools
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Men aren't the only ones that know how to aim a caulk gun or a timing light. Show 'em you ain't afraid to get a little grease under your nails.
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Real Men Wear Flannel
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It's comfortable, stylish, and sexy. Not only that, it's cuddly! Uh, I mean, manly.
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I'm Not Old, I'm Retro
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Don't let my plaid pants fool you, I'm not out of date. Actually, I'm ahead of my time. They'll come back around, you'll see...
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Coffee
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Don't worry, there is the one for the gals, too.
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Blissfully Ignorant
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It's easy to keep a smile on your face when you're oblivious to the world around you.
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Generation Gap
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More now then ever, we seem to keep with us a little bit of every decade since we were born.
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Old Enough
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It's a good place to be when you can make your own choices, not limited by lack of knowledge, nor stiffness of the bones.
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Wood
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Well, what can I say? Wood is funny.....
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