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<span id="wow">I say we give Iran all the nukes they can handle!</span> We think a mushroom cloud says it all. Anyone who disagrees with us gets bombed back to the stone age. Or the sand age, whatever.
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<span id="wow">Homo Honey</span> We don't like the term "fag hag" so we've invented our own. Homo Honeys are hot and here to stay!
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<span id="wow">Not Gay I Just Like Rainbows</span> Everyone likes seeing a beautiful rainbow. You don't have to be gay to enjoy all the pretty colors!
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<span id="wow">The Hairy Donut Lounge</span> Stick your finger in a hot one. Best Hairy Donuts in town! Sprinkles and lap dances are extra.
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<span id="wow">Stop Making Baby Jesus Cry. Asshole.</span> When you do something bad, you make baby Jesus cry. Stop it!
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<span id="wow">I Have To Vote For Change Because I'm All Out of Dollars</span> With the collapse of the banks, all of our money going overseas to foreign oil and war, prices rising, markets falling, how can you possibly have any dollars left?
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<span id="wow">I'll Be Bush Free Jan. 20, 2009</span> No matter who wins the election, Republican, Democrat, or the crazy guy in the cheese hat, we all have something we can look forward to. We will all be Bush Free as of January 20, 2009!
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<span id="wow">Gaming Wench for Hire</span> Everyone needs a gaming wench, but there are just too few good women for hire. Try a gaming wench t-shirt and watch the gold pieces roll in!
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<span id="wow">I Heart Cleaver</span> Some people heart NY, but who doesn't love a meat cleaver t shirt? It's very "cleaver." Don't be afraid to tell the world! Great for a costume, butchers or serial killers. Disturb co-workers, teachers, friends...
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<span id="wow">Dumbledore Sucks Dick!</span> Whether you are upset or enjoy the fact that Rowling has decided Dumbledore is gay, there is no denying Dumbledore Sucks Dick. It's just part of the wand-work.
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<span id="wow">Who's Your Baghdaddy?</span> Well, who? Is it the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines? All of them? Damn straight it is! Every working soldier in America's armed forces is your Baghdaddy tonight!
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<span id="wow">Varsity Programming</span> Being a programmer is sweaty work, you obviously need an athletic T shirt. One that makes fun of the Varsity jocks is even better. If we have to explain the binary 69 to you, you are obviously JV.
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<span id="wow">Meat is Murder! Hot, greasy, tasty murder…</span> Who wants to eat "rabbit food" <br>when you can just eat the rabbit? Sure a good steak once said Mooo, but when it sizzles, it is the cows way of saying "Eat me."
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<span id="wow">Yes I am. No, you can't watch.</span> You can download it on the internet though...
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<span id="wow">What's Wrong with Youth In Asia? Pick Your Poison</span> This little Asian has mystery vials. Poison Toys, poison dog food, poison toothpaste? We wonder what might be recalled next. Maybe they are trying to Euthanize us...
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<span id="wow">Got Green?</span> Everybody's got Milk, but do they Got Green?
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<span id="wow">Big Cock</span> Who doesn't like a big rooster? Betty likes it when the big cock crows. There's no better way to wake up. We're sure there's a South Carolina Gamecock fan out there who just might love this.
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<span id="wow">It's OK to be Ugly, but you're really pushin' it…</span> Sometimes it's just nicer to let people know they are really just too ugly to be near you. For you, this shirt, for them we suggest this season's hottest accessory--the paper bag.
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<span id="wow">Little Princess, bow to your QUEEN!</span> You may curtsy if you wish. <br>Do nothing to gain our displeasure or...<br><b>OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!!!!</b> Being a Queen can be hard with all the little princesses running around.
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<span id="wow">It's all about the booty! </span>The pirates are just tellin' it like it is on this T-shirt. Shake it! Arrr!
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<span id="wow">Wanna see a trick<br>I learned in prison?</span> Everyone loves tricks! And if someone says "Yes," well they can't convict you if it's voluntary. Except in South Carolina.
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<span id="wow">Sprinklers Make Me Wet</span>  It's true. Sprinklers will make you wet -- something should. It's always refreshing to be wet and satisfied. Others will clap with delight over this shirt. Perhaps your favorite landscaper would love this.
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<span id="wow">Magically Gaylicious</span> Merlin was always playing with Arthur's Sword, Gandalf liked to dance with Hobbits, and now Dumbledore is gay and out of the closet. If Wizards are Gay, they must be Magically Gaylicious and now you can be too!
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<span id="wow">Do Your Part - Go Green</span> The latest trend in ecological/social consciousness. Its for the environment. Everyones doing it.
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<span id="wow">Volcano God (virgin sacrifice needed)</span> Sometimes the natives call for a virgin sacrifice. <br>It's your religious duty to comply. You do not want to anger the Volcano God!
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<span id="wow">What Were You Saying? All I Heard Was "Moooo."</span> Moooooo! Try something different, learn a new language. Speak with the bovines-- its good for inter-species relationships.
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<span id="wow">Geek Love</span> Geeks are known lovers and gamers. It's just on occasion you gotta bring out the tough love to work your game. With a set of pistols. Nothing says I love you like a good Headshot!
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<span id="wow">Meat Eater</span> Nothing better than a big piece of meat in your mouth.
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<span id="wow">Varsity Beer Pong</span> Are you playing beer pong at the varsity level? Tell the world! Oh and keep your balls clean (hint: that's what the Latin Phrase says)
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<span id="wow">You remind me of my dead ex-boyfriend</span> The resemblance is really <br>quite uncanny! Now take off your pants so I can be completely sure.
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<span id="wow">Seeking The Golden Snatch</span> Seekers across the globe are looking for that magical Golden Snatch. Harry Potter and Victor Krum aren't the only ones trying to get their hands on a little Golden Snatch.
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<span id="wow">It's Psychosomatic. You Need a Lobotomy. I'll Get the Saw.</span> Trust us, we're trauma professionals. The best way to perform a labotomy is with a saw, you might think ice pick, but we prefer saw. It makes a bigger impression.
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<span id="wow">I Make Yellow Snow.</span> Don't you always wonder where the yellow snow comes from? This little fella has done his part to make winter special. Perfect for winter!
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<span id="wow">I Had a Blast in Iraq</span> Your favorite serviceman or woman will love this shirt. Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines all of them are having a blast!
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<span id="wow">You blow up our buildings, we blow up your country. </span> (And the countries around you, just to be safe)<br> Have a nice day!
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<span id="wow">I wouldn't recommend sex, drugs, or insanity for everyone, but they've always worked for me.</span>
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<span id="wow">I eat Bunnies like you for breakfast</span> It is the most important meal of the day. Some people like bacon & eggs others like oral sex. I personally like my bunnies over-easy.
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<span id="wow">Hopeless Romantic Seeks Intelligent Ectomorph (If you Have to Ask, Move Along)</span> From Kierra Knightly to Alexis Bledel, Angelina Jolie to Cameron Diaz, every man loves a slender, big eyed ectomorph. And if she has brains, even better!
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<span id="wow">After Sex Towel</span> Let that special someone of the moment know that you are like a Boy Scout-- prepared for everything. Here, you may want to use this to wipe off your face. How very thoughtful!
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<span id="wow">Classy Tux</span> Sometimes you just want to dress it up without being formal. Wear it to the office party or have a dressier casual Friday. Hell, wear it to prom -- it was good enough in the 80s and it has stood the test of time.
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<span id="wow">I am the crazy peoples</span> Medication isn't for everyone. Some of like to be a little crazy.
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<span id="wow">Infidel and proud</span> Iran, Iraq, and any other heathen society can take their moral fiber and cram it right up their sweaty robes. If they want American Infidels, then I say we make more!
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<span id="wow">Nosey Little Fuck</span> From far away, just tiny little words on your chest. And every nosey little fuck you see will come up to you and try to read it. Luckily some of them are cute.
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<span id="wow">TSA, successfully protecting Americans from rogue Toiletries, Scissors, and Aftershave since 2001</span>
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<span id="wow">Kill unto others before they kill unto you.</span> It isn't exactly biblical, but for our troops overseas, it is a life lesson. Even in some American neighborhoods, its not too far from the truth.
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<span id="wow">High Score</span> Score the highest you can. Mary Jane always digs the one with the high score. High Score? Is that bad? Did I break it?
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<span id="wow">You Suck. That's Why You're So Popular.</span>Give this to someone who sucks-- candy canes of course or maybe some nice, HARD... Candy. Great for Winter!
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<span id="wow">Parental Advisory, I say Fuck a lot.</span> Parents, you've been warned. Fuck, fuck, fuckidy fuck fuck. Smurf.
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<span id="wow">Freak Magnet</span> Raise your hand if you feel this way on a daily basis. Yeah.. we thought so, you <b>ARE</b> a Freak Magnet.
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<span id="wow">Warning: May Fling Poo or other Bodily Fluids.</span> Stand back at least 10 feet. Good advice for Monkeys, children, and drunk college students.
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<span id="wow">Strangers always have the best candy.</span> Chocolate, fireballs, and roofies are my favorite. Sometimes they also have cute little puppies in their van. Make them taste any "suckers" themselves first though.
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<span id="wow">Hefner '08 Let the Bunnies Rule!</span>We honestly can't think of a better candidate. At least the first <u>ladies</u> would be smokin' hot! From what we've seen its better to have a playboy in the Whitehouse anyway.
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<span id="wow">Come to the Darkside, we have full medical</span> Be part of the T-shirt Trauma team. Wear our logo!
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<span id="wow">Infidel</span> Hell, let's face it, we're a country of infidels. Doesn't matter if you are pro-war, anti-war, or don't realize we are at war. If you live in the USA you are an infidel by default. It's all the naked ankles and bare heads...
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<span id="wow">Fine Asian Cuisine</span> The Kanji writing says "Eat Me" for those still confused exactly what to do with your sweet little box of Yung Poon Cum. Who says Asian girls have to be reserved and shy? I'd like the Take-Out please.
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<span id="wow">I eat the hearts of my enemies with ketchup.</span> Really, why even bother ripping someone's heart out if you don't have a good bottle of Ketchup nearby to douse it in. And invariably spill on this shirt.
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<span id="wow">Spoiled Little Bitch</span> Nurse Betty is. Join the club! It's not just limited to Paris Hilton or Brittney Spears anymore! Just scream or get naked til you get your way. Or wear the shirt so people know right away! Its American!
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<span id="wow">Deport Pedro</span> It shouldn't be hard to find him. We just saw him standing outside the Home Depot. If he is an illegal immigrant, call border patrol. Otherwise tell him to grab his tools and hop in the truck...
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<span id="wow">It Takes Balls to be a Cross Dresser</span> Well it does -- You may not see them, but we assure you, they're there.
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<span id="wow">Life is grand with a big banana!</span> Monkeys know best! The bigger the banana, the longer it lasts and the better it tastes! So get a Banana T-shirt and let the world know Life is Grand.
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<span id="wow">Crazy Bitch</span> Strippers, Naughty Nurses, School Teachers... All have potential to be Crazy Bitches.
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<span id="wow">Heave to and surrender yer booty!</span> You heard the pirate. Prepare to be boarded!
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<span id="wow">The Golden Snatch</span>
Everyone wants to catch one! Have seekers, chasers, and bludgers trying to catch you, The Golden Snatch!
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<span id="wow">Even Pirates and Ninjas can agree: Cowboys Suck</span>  Cowboys are just little hoovers. Either you like that or you don't. Unfortunately we saw Brokeback Mountain and know it's true.
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<span id="wow">Come to the Darkside, travel to galaxies far, far away, meet new sentient beings and kill them</span> Even in the future, the Army still has the same slogan. Luckily there still seems to be plenty of war...
TT001040
<span id="wow">If your a fairy, I'm a goblin.</span> An age old fantasy, with a new twist! If you like women with wings or gay men, (or men with wings or absinthe models) this shirt tells the them that you'd like to get a little gobbling done. Gobble.
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<span id="wow">There's always something surprising in my pants</span> Hmmm, what could I be hiding in my pants? Go ahead...Take a look!
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<span id="wow">Don't be sexist, chicks hate that.</span> Broads & dames hate it even more. Babes don't seem to mind as much as feminists, but in general, be sexy, not sexist.
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<span id="wow">Haiku are simple, but they often don't make sense. Hippopotamus.</span> Syllables go 5-7-5 in this poem. Probably the only thing we remember from Jr. High English.
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<span id="wow">Do Me (A Favor)</span> From far away it says one thing, but up close, it says quite another. Let people do a double take. See who has their mind in the gutter. Then explain the favor is the first part of the shirt.
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<span id="wow">Dead Man's Pirate Crew</span> Dead Man's Pirate Crew T-shirt. They may look Jolly, but these pirates will cut ya from stem ta stern! So avast, heave too, and be warned! Savvy?
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<span id="wow">If I'm naughty, will you spank me?</span> Will you? 'Cause I have been really naughty. I think I have a paddle around here somewhere. Did you bring any handcuffs?
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<span id="wow">If you don't go down, go away</span> Why waste precious time on someone who isn't the giver you need in your life?
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<span id="wow">Single, sexy, and out of your league</span> Why waste time talking to rejects who approach you? Just point to the shirt. If they could read, they would have known anyway...
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<span id="wow">Every night the clowns come and steal a little more of my sanity</span> We've found out they make medication for this, but if it's not effective, just keep a baseball bat handy.
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<span id="wow">If you really are what you eat, I could be you by morning.</span> This shirt gives "Hunger" a whole new meaning...Come here, let me taste you.
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<span id="wow">Shiver me timbers and blow me down</span> There's only two things to do with Pirate timber, shiver it or blow it down! So lassie, get over here and start blowing this pirate.
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<span id="wow">Exit 69. Beaver Ruin Rd</span> Yes, it's a real road.  "Beaver Ruin" is something we couldn't make up! Although in my opinion 69 doesn't ruin the beaver at all...
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<span id="wow">Free Lovin' Satisfaction Guaranteed or your money back!</span> We would also be happy to give you another round of lovin' to help you reach satisfaction. Then again, sometimes you get what you pay for.
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<span id="wow">Snow Job.</span>Frosty the Snowman did always like a good Snow Job. Great for This winter's cold weather!
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<span id="wow">T-Shirt Model</span> You're a trained professional. Betta Recognize!
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<span id="wow">Think You Can Catch The Golden Snatch?</span> Give those seekers a challange and see if they have the broomstick to catch your Golden Snatch. Even Harry Potter might not catch a snatch like yours...
TT001143
<span id="wow">Nympho</span> Nymphs are all about the O..oo...OOO.. Orgasm. Again and again and again. So get a Nympho shirt to warn away the weak boys and tantalize the men. Oh, and you can always try to earn one from Doc Trauma in stead of buying it.
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<span id="wow">I like going down (STAIRS)</span> From far away it says one thing, but up close, it says quite another. Let people do a double take. See who has their mind in the gutter.
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<span id="wow">Hopeless romantic seeking pretty boy with big dick</span> Why not advertise exactly what you are looking for. Like Pretty Boys? Then say it. Like Big Dicks? Then tell people. At least the ugly, vienna sausage boys will leave you alone.
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<span id="wow">I deem thee unworthy!</span> You have always known the people around you were unworthy of your presence. Now tell them!
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<span id="wow">Unicorns ate my baby</span> What?!? Another cute little unicorn shirt? Oh but wait, what's that hanging from it's mouth? A baby shoe?! Guess those horns are for more than show...
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<span id="wow">Recovering Catholic</span> Everybody's got a 12 step these days. I bet this religious one is bigger than AA.
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<span id="wow">Recovering Catholic Schoolgirl</span> It may not be possible to recover completely, but at least now you only have to wear the schoolgirl uniform for you boyfriend's birthday. Or your halloween costume. With Hello Kitty panties. Naughty.
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<span id="wow">Corruptible</span> If you just let people know, there is always someone happy to oblige. Corrupt me, please. Pretty please? Just a little corruption?
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<span id="wow">Hopeless romantic seeking girl who still looks good when I am sober</span> Why is this so hard? Are you ladies trying to make me an alcoholic? How did you put on all that weight between last night and this morning anyway?
TT001082
<span id="wow">What's wrong with youth in asia?</span> Everyone has their opinion. It's really a question of morals right? Today's Youth in Asia may call for our Euthanasia with guns. Or they might just poison us to death. And there is always nukes.
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<span id="wow">Come to the Dark Side, the sex is better</span> If you haven't figured this out by now, that's why you are not getting laid. Even the Jedi knew how to use a little force to make the sex pop, but the Sith make it sing...
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<span id="wow">Old School Playa</span> My mom & dad just gave me a roll of quarters. Let's go to the arcade & pick up!
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<span id="wow">Savvy?</span> Pirates savvy. Captain Jack Savvies. Elizabeth is definitely savvy. Well, what about you mate?
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<span id="wow">Twinkie</span> Not the snack food, though definitely worth a nibble or two.
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<span id="wow">Single, sexy, and out of your league</span> Why waste time talking to rejects who approach you? Just point to the shirt. If they could read, they would have known anyway...
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<span id="wow">Frack</span> Starbuck says it, Apollo says it, even Tom Zarek and the President say it. Cussing in the future is cool. Especially if you are on a Battlestar.
TT001111
<span id="wow">You remind me of my dead ex-girlfriend</span> We won't go into exactly what happened to her, but maybe you can help me through the pain ;-)
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<span id="wow">Devil Woman</span> She's a little Betty Paige; a little satan herself. Are you one? or do you know one? Great Costume.
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<span id="wow">Bedroom Gangsta</span> If you need a description of what this means, you aren't one. Move along.
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<span id="wow">Life is grand with a big banana!</span> Ask Doc Trauma -- his life is pretty grand. The bigger the banana, the more there is to share!
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<span id="wow">Interface Expert</span> It takes an expert to make sure the rack is big enough, all ports are open, and that the main cable gets properly plugged into the box.
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<span id="wow">Drugs are bad. Unless you're bipolar</span> True-er words were never spoken! Plus, aren't we all Bi-polar?
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<span id="wow">Evil </span> If you are evil, wear it with a twinkle in your eye. Evil will get you everywhere - it's only polite to warn others. Why not match this Evil shirt with horns and a tail for the perfect devil or succubus costume!
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<span id="wow">Come to the Darkside we have full medical</span> Which is a good thing, because as Anakin can tell you, being dipped in lava and/or having appendages chopped off can get expensive, even with workman's comp.
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<span id="wow">Madness Takes It's Toll. Please Have Exact Change</span> Lips, whips and a whole lot of toast! That's the toll of madness. Le Rocky Horror, Le Rocky Horror.
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<span id="wow">I'm completely naked under this shirt</span> Don't be afraid to tell the world that you are a true nudist under your clothes.
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<span id="wow">333 Half Evil</span>
Not ready to fully commit to Evil? Go half way then. Back of shirt states "333 Half Evil"
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<span id="wow">Skulls with helmets</span> Past, present, Future? Who have the oppressors been? Who are they now? And who will they be? The good news is they will eventually be dead skulls too.
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<span id="wow">Vulva</span> They're boxy but they're cute. Every man wants to drive one.
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<span id="wow">Wanker</span> "Wanker literally means "one who wanks" (masturbates). I'm a wanker, he's a wanker, she's a wanker, wouldn't you like to be a wanker too?
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<span id="wow">Yes I am. No, you can't watch.</span> You can buy the movie though...
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<span id="wow">G spot Man</span> It takes a lot of special training to get one of these. Our Naugh-Tee Nurses love a man with a big badge.
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<span id="wow">Ms. Old School Playa</span> Video games have been around since the silicon age, and you know you played this one. Or your mom did and still beats you at it so you quit. If not, go play Halo 3 you little bastard.
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<span id="wow">Crack Dog</span> Here little crack doggy! Here boy! Watch out -- He isn't house broken.
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<span id="wow">Osama Bin Forgotten?</span> Well, hasn't he been? I sure don't see Osama Bin Laden's ugly head on a pike outside the Whitehouse yet. Does he need to release video tapes on Fox to get back on the most wanted list?
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<span id="wow">Still Plays Dress-Up</span> And this shirt screams, if you're lucky, I'll do it for you. Whether you dress up like a nurse, naughty schoolgirl, or medieval knight, you need this shirt. It pays to advertise.
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<span id="wow">Clown</span> We like scary clowns; how 'bout you? You can't look away, can you?
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<span id="wow">Boy With Big Broomstick Seeks The Golden Snatch</span> It pays to advertise what you have AND what you are looking for, even in Quidditch. The bigger the broomstick, the more likely you will catch that Golden Snatch!
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<span id="wow">Little Devil</span> What a cute little critter to wear on your chest. "The little devil made me do it."
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